Wednesday, May 16, 2012

One Thing I'm Afraid to Tell You...

My friend Ayana sent me this article:  http://www.creaturecomfortsblog.com/home/2012/5/3/things-im-afraid-to-tell-you.html

Basically, the post talks about how everything in Blog land is "pretty" and "cheerful" and "saccrine".  Real life isn't like that.  Real life is raw and more often than not, we don't talk about the raw things that make us tick.  We talk about our cards and projects and we "Woot, woot" and "Ack" and "Yaaay" for everything.  That's an impossible standard to live up to.  So, every week, I'm going to tell you a couple of things that I would otherwise not say because I don't want to sully your idea of me.

Here goes...

I'm a REAL woman.  Not gangsta "Real" but, I have stretch marks and two stomachs real.  I weigh over 200lbs and I LOVE food.  I'm going to a personal trainer three times a week.  I've just got to stay on top of my healthy food choices.


I've spent almost 50k (since first going to college in '00 to now) on a degree that I don't plan on using.  I don't believe in the way we teach kids in this country and while I respect the teachers, administrators and support staff that essentially help raise our youth, I don't want to be part of it.  So, I guess I'm going to try my hand at corporate training.



I am overwhelmed with all my Design Teams.  I thought I was doing well by working with companies that make great products.  Turns out that I design for a few too many! I'm burned out.  I want to be a respected, admired and sought after crafter BUT...it is NOT worth my crafty soul!  I'm tired damn it!  This was a good lesson for me.  Work smart and not hard right?  Let me clarify by saying I'm NOT ungrateful, I'm NOT stepping down but, I need to learn how to make crafting work for me...right now...that's not happening.



 I don't like to hug and I don't like people to touch me.  You know how someone will laugh and slap your shoulder or arm?  Yeah, well I hate that ish!  I count when I hug people...1 one thousand, 2 one thousand, 3 one thousand.  I don't like it!

Sigh...so, that's some of the stuff I'm afraid to tell you.  I hope you liked this post.  If you did...I encourage you to go forth and post about your own realities!




24 comments:

Natasha said...

Rochelle, I feel you on the education thing. You are a beautiful woman (I too love food!) Keep up the beautiful work that you do, and remember it's ok to say f* it sometimes and take a personal day (or month).

Scrapaddict said...

Thanks for being open about "YOU". You are so right about the "pictures" painted in blogland. I read way too many profiles that say I am married to the most supportive/handsome/caring man in the world" and I always say "we cannot all be married to the same man"

Sara Mac said...

Love this post Rochelle! Way to keep it real. Love your honesty. You are a beautiful woman. I really like that last photo of you -- so cheery. I'll warn you now that if we ever meet in person I'm going to hug you:)

Trina said...

I feel you! Except on the hugging; I'm touchy-feely. But I do hate when people stand extremely close to me to talk. Like, what if I'm not comfortable with how my lunch is simmering and need to burp? Why does anyone need to be close enough to smell my burp? Especially if we barely know each other...

Patti J said...

I totally understand about the burn out. In December, when my DT terms ended, I didn't stay on. I stepped down from all but one, and I just love it too much to give it up. I only this month started a second DT. It's okay to say no, Rochelle. And it's perfectly okay to tell your DT that you need a week or three off to take care of priorities. If they are true friends, they will be there when and if you decide to return. As for your two stomachs, you are beautiful. Career changes in today's world happen just about every second! Embrace life - figure out what you want to do, and go for it. Teaching is not for everyone. I worked 22 years in a school office, and could NEVER be in the classroom. Touch feely - only with family and very close friends. As for blogland being joyful and all about cards, I think that's just the sort of blogs we have. Some people do cooking blogs, some do quilting, others woodworking, some use their blogs as weight loss or emotional/physical abuse situation journals. Our little community just shows off their paper treasures. There's no reason I can think of that we don't share other things, except, gosh - I just never thought to do it! Thanks for the inspiration! Hang in there sweetie - take time off when you need it, and try to coordinate your cards to work for more than one DT assignment - I do that a lot! Good luck, and God bless!!!

SYLVIA-ANNE said...

Not everyone feels the need to share their innermost thoughts with the world Rochelle. There is more than enough "raw" stuff going on in the world - what we all need is a little more peace and happiness.
Sylvia x

Michelle said...

I love this post Rochelle! If we meet in person, I'll try to remember to not hug you, but if I forget, you can remind me. ;-) I have a teaching degree that I don't use (high school music and history), but I think it is still useful to have. You will probably find a way to use all those skills you learned also. I try to add real stuff from my life into my blog, but I'm not sure anyone actually reads my words that surround my cards (or my photos on my photo blog). I don't share things that I wouldn't share in real life, though, and I'm fairly private about my personal struggles. As for all of the positive talk - I think we comment when we like something or when we want to encourage, and I love that, it gives me a real lift some days to receive that positive encouragement. Rochelle, you are a beautiful woman, thanks for sharing these things about yourself!

Rochelle said...

Sylvia-Anne, I'm not insinuating that everyone do it. I'm stating that I have been inspired by the article that was shared with me and I want to share more real details about my life. I'm aiming for a balance between what I deem as blog talk and reality.

Bee's hive said...

Don't sweat it! I constantly bitch and moan about stuff, and when I'm cranky. Blogging and papercrafting is therapy for me, who else wants to listen to me lament?!
I know hugging can be hard for reasons that people don't understand, it seems that people want to hug me after I've been sweating or have been eating onions, and I hate when people elbow or hit me too. And SHOOOOOT stop looking fashion mags and you'll instantly feel better about yourself, you're more real and tons prettier then those walking sticks anyways!
And if your DT coordinator doesn't say take a vaca babe, then I would seriously consider taking a permanent one. We make cards for people because we want to share our feelings and if you feel forced, then make the projects that you want to make.
You're fine and normal. Chillax:)

Ayana Red said...

Awww, I LOVE the real, girl!

Jen W. said...

Your post definitely stirred up a lot of thoughts for me. I love to hear from a fellow "real" woman. I want to own who and what I am but I'm still hiding behind a picture of palm trees on my blog. Maybe one day I'll put an actual picture of me there.

I've often rolled my eyes at the super happy cheeriness of a lot of blogs out there but at the same time the encouragement and support I've gotten since I started blogging are really important to me. I like that you're trying to find a balance between the real world and the bloggie world.

Then I had a moment of cattiness when you said you were worn out by being on so many DTs. I've been really bummed lately after racking up 6 DT rejections and this chick is complaining about being on too many DTs?? But people don't get on DTs for no reason. If you're on them then you worked hard and earned that spot. So I just need to work a bit harder to get on one and not worry about who else is getting on instead of me.

I really respect your honesty and commitment to who you are. The posts like this one are some of my favourites of yours. I look forward to many more!

Tenia Nelson said...

Love this, girl!!! Thanks for keeping it real, yo!!! I am soooooo happy that you did this!!! LOVE!!!

Savannah O'Gwynn said...

What a great post--LOVE that you shared most of what you don't want to share with us! HONESTY! LOOOOOOOOOOVE:) And I think you are super amazing and beautiful! I'm so thankful our paths have crossed:)

Kelly Jo said...

I knew I loved your blog for a reason- now I like it even more...thanks for keeping it real!!!! You're super talented and I respect your craftiness, for whatever that's worth!!

Sassy said...

Oh, Rochelle... I have read your post several times since yesterday each time bringing me to tears. You are the lucky one girl. It is so obvious by the responses received that you are loved no matter who you are or what you believe. I wish I could say the same thing. If being on a DT is not fun and something you look forward to - give it a break. Open that spot to someone that at this time in their life wants it. You made all these DTs once because of your outstanding creativeness. If after taking a break and time to reflect on our priorities, you can always reapply and I would bet you would be welcomed back anywhere. Slow it down. Each day when I read your FB posts I am overwhelmed just reading all you do on top of working FT and having a loving husband and adorable son. Don't let those precious times pass you by with regrets later wondering where all the years went when he was little and home and still wanted to be with his Mom. Just my two cents worth. Whatever you do and decide, I am sure you will continue to sparkle.

MousEarz said...

Awesome post Rochelle. Bless you for your courage and honesty. You are a brilliant & talented lady...let me augment that statement by adding beautiful as well (seriously awesome smile). I hope you find your crafty balance and continue to share your talent with the world. No hugs...just a big "thumbs up". :)

Vicki Dutcher said...

OMG! You Go Girl!! Calling it like you see it and more proud for it! I am impressed with you -- and even though you are are "too many teams" - they are lucky to have you! You rock out gorgeous cards AND that is the truth :)

If I ever meet you -- I will hug you! ;) Just sayin...

Peggysuez said...

Oh my gosh you have been stalking my life, except for the part about too many design teams. I've got one and a guest spot and thats enough for me. I also started tipping the scales at 200 lbs. but there is no personal trainer in the picture! :) way to be real!

Peggysuez said...

And the hugging part. Are you family like one of my kids? Great! Are you anyone else? It better be a darn quick hug!

Karen B. said...

You are crazy beautiful! My gosh, how fun would it be to be able to stamp with you in person, we could crank out all our design team posts for the month!! You are inspiring. I know that I don't leave comments very often (sorry, I'll try to be better!) but each and every creation of yours is outstanding. Oh, and I am way overweight. That is why my profile picture hasn't been updated in for forever.

Dana said...

You inspire me Rochelle. You are beautiful, intelligent, kind, real, and clearly talented. I really appreciate your "reality check". I've always been shy about posting too much personal stuff on my blog, but you are right. It's good for readers to know that not everything is sunshine and roses.
As a newly single mom, (nope, never had the best, most supportive husband! lol) with two special needs kids (who are a TRUE handful), who works full time outside the home, is on 4 DTs, and is incredibly overweight, I feel like posting my cards with a smile is the best I can do some days :)
Thanks for being who you are...Hang in there.
"Sometimes the best thing you can do is not think. Not wonder. Not imagine. Not obsess. Just breathe. And have faith that everything will work out for the best."

Barb said...

I thought you were awesome before. I think you're even more awesome now! Honesty is liberating and I hope writing this post has helped you release some of the tension, stress and what you feel my be things people woulnd't like about you. And, in case you didn't know it, you are a stone cold stunnah...if I was 'that' kind of person I could be extremely jealous of you! But, I'm not, and I like you...as is. Don't ever change. *fist bump* not hugs ;)

Karen Diebolt said...

Hi Rochelle - this is my first visit to your blog and I love your honesty. I visited your "about me" page to see if you had written a meaning for your blog title. I am just curious if it has a special meaning to you. You don't have to share if you don't want to but I also wanted to say I really like your family photo also. I am always saying that we need to remember that we are all 'human' and therefore none of us are perfect. This post is a great reminder. Thanks for sharing, and even though I work in the education field, I do agree with you about public schools. Every year I get more and more frustrated with the school system.

kate blue said...

am catching up on my blog entries and writing up a little something for Friday since I'll be out of town and super busy but decided to troll around your blog too...interesting facts! I just know that if you met me IRL, you'd hug me for sure! I'm jolly and loveable like that!